Dancing.

Eunbin Kim in Kintsugi  by Eleonora Pennacchini KINTSUGI What is our worth? Who defines it? Our sense of self? Falling I am whole Broken Healing Kintsugi is a Japanese pottery art that puts together broken pieces with gold... More precious Enriched Lived Valuable Even more so than it ever was before... My scars...a part of me My injuries... Part of my body's history. Embodiment Humans & Artists Breakable Frail Yet strong. Embrace me Take your time Trust time Allow the breeze to caress your skin Goosebumps... A sign of response & reaction The body is alive It's healing Give it time! We are worth giving ourselves time. The leaves are blowing Like the seasons everything in life is cyclical I am painting my memories on my body Each fracture line liquid fire... Burning The body manifests itself A cry for attention A caring touch Transformations, imperfections, passing time... These do not define my worth. I dip a paintbrush in a bowl of god... And trace with pride the lines ...

  Pforzheim, 14th November 2022 I am not broken, I am not to be thrown away, I am not done. My injury doesn't define me, or who I am as a human or artist. I have not yet told all the stories that need to be told... My body wants to heal, I want to heal...and it's healing, I am healing. A dancer is not done when they are injured... A dancer just needs time to heal. Healing takes time... Don't feel rushed. Breathe... It's ok, you don't need answers now. It's ok to be sad and sit with the broken pieces. It's ok to acknowledge the pain. It's ok to acknowledge we all break. It's part of being human.  You are no lesser because of it. We are no lesser than we were before. Our worth has not shrunk.

General recurring elements:  - There seems to be a generalized idea that empathy  +  acknowledging   students are some of the most important things a teacher can do. - Dancers feel like the human  connection is the best thing a teacher can give them. (This was the overall number one thing that stuck with them the most...). - Having  long-term goals is one of the most important things (psychologically) for dance injury management. - Men seem to prefer a  more competitive learning environment than women. When I first approached the book Decolonizing Methodologies , I truly struggled to understand the connection with my work/research/MA...it made no sense to me. But one sentence resonated with me...and that was along the lines of 'understanding our responsibility as a researcher'. We can't go, ask people to share parts of their lives, leave...and expect that nothing has changed in them, and in us. Something DID. I took it as my 'mission', in this fieldwo...

  Pforzheim, 17th September 2022 Upon reading a paragraph on biases in Wolcott's book, I decided to look into biases  a little bit more, as I realized I had no real awareness of them. According to Wolcott, it is important to identify good "biases" (such as careers, personalities, and situations), as they constitute the essential starting  place for our own research. To articulate on that, I can say that I am: 1. A professional dancer researching  the professional and pre-professional dance world, so I cannot really step into the role of the "outsider". 2. I have a very extroverted and empathic personality, which could get me a little more involved in the topic than what is normally expected by a "detached researcher". 3. I am coming out of two injuries, and I have been super lucky to be in somewhat of an "ideal" condition for my injury recovery. I have to be aware that this is not the case for everyone, and that the support I received is NO...

  In these past few days, I have been reflecting a lot on the 'system' dance culture is embedded in , and on how it is a whole combination of things that allowed me to fully recover, not just one.  In my questionnaire , I asked dancers what helped them the most in their recovery. I asked for individual things, which I believe  does  have its validity, but upon reflecting more thoroughly on my  personal experiences with injuries, I realized I wouldn't have made it if it wasn't for a  whole  support system.  Doctors : Should have my doctor not so aggressively want me to heal, and get to the source of the problem, I never would have found what I had, and probably wouldn't be dancing anymore.  N.B. please note, this was ONLY possible because of the incredible financial support of my german health insurance.  Physios : You need  to find the right one for you, it's so important! I had terrible  physio experiences on my healing journ...

Dance Injury Management  Coming back from holidays, one realizes that many dancers didn't train...(in a way rightfully ...holidays shouldn't be about work...) but the risk of injuries is high... What to do about that? Despite what they think, and tell one another, dancers don't really feel comfortable  sharing  their predicament with their teachers and directors... As a result of this, teachers and directors navigate the studio virtually 'blind'... For fear, guilt, or embarrassment, dancers don't share if they are struggling with something...so basically, all minor and major injuries are  hidden .  Little tears start to happen. Doctor visits are hidden, and there is an unspoken fear, amongst dancers, that if they talk, they'll be left behind... The weirdest thing is that I've also seen  directors  do the same thing...hiding their injuries from their dancers... The same with teachers... It seems that, no matter the point of the ladder you are at, you ar...

  Pforzheim, September 8th 2022   'Learning - in the   broad enculturative sense of coming to understand what one needs to know to be competent in the roles one may expect to fulfill in society [...] is an ongoing process in which each human engages throughout a lifetime. In Brad's case, the direction that process was taking seemed to reflect all too well what he felt society expected of him: Nothing.'  (Wolcott 1994) Wow...this quote shocked me...but it is somewhat true. In a minor way, I feel like I experienced something similar, and I have enough of a grasp of what it means to feel that way to be able to start relating to it. As a dancer in a company, when you feel like no one expects something of you, you feel worthless. You start questioning everything and often make questionable choices to try to fix things (e.g. starving yourself thinking they don't like you because you are too big, or overtraining in your free time because they make you feel like yo...

Pforzheim, September 5th 2022 I just started reading Wolcott's book... I can't believe I completely forgot to make time for the data analysis...how could I? I MUST make time for that. Maybe I need to cut down on the reading... I don't know... To date, it seems like I am going to go for a more analytic  kind of approach... I am curious to see how things evolve...

Keeping a reflective journal has taught me so much about myself...some things I appreciate more than others...but oh well...what we learn is what we learn...we can't really pick. Writing has made me realize that for so many years I have 'subdued' myself & my truth for the  fear  of being rejected/pushed away/fired...etc. Too many times I have suppressed my thoughts and my feelings thinking "it's ok...", "it doesn't matter..." when in reality I knew things were NOT OK...and DID MATTER...at least to me.  I now realize that these behavioural patterns I created to 'survive' in this very competitive world, played a big role in squishing me into boxes I felt 'suffocated' by. And somehow, these behaviours, succeeded in making me become 'less visible'... quite the paradox for someone who is working and living as a professional performing artist.  But where has the person  behind the artist  gone? Picture by Bernd Hentschel Eve...

Picture credit: Pixabay.com We had two incredible writing classes the past  few weeks with Peter Thomas and Sam Murray. I enjoyed them beyond what I could have expected, as they truly made me think of writing in a complete different manner. I've always seen writing as a functional or creative tool, but I never really considered it as a means of learning. This is quite a 'revolutionising' shift in perspective for me, as I believe it will change a lot in my personal practice. I decided to give a go to the 'free flow' writing exercise we were introduced to in our first class, to figure out what I really wanted to share here on my blog. I was surprised by the result, as when we allow our brain to wander on the blank page, things we couldn't foresee do start to surface.  One thing I could have never anticipated, is how free flow writing can help reveal diverse perspectives on things one has within oneself. Yes...I know this sounds bizarre, but I actually think that I...

I've been out of university for almost 10 years now... and what a privilege it feels to be able to go back to school. I am studying because I WANT to study... not because I HAVE to, or because I have something to prove... . What a shift in perspective... . And how internally revolutionising this feels.  I am incredibly grateful for all the intellectually stimulating exchanges this course is offering me. For the questions it is raising in me, the structure for reflection it is providing me, and for showing me new directions in which to watch . I feel like I am uncovering every day a new layer of understanding of the question: ' Who am I as a learner ?'. I hadn't questioned this for a while... and just by doing that I feel like I have unlocked a new chapter  of my journey, and I have a new pair of goggles with which to explore the world.  Although my daily life has pretty much stayed the same... the way in which I approach things has completely changed. I have a refound s...

Tuesday's lecture got me thinking on the potential Areas of Learning  I've encountered over the past five years... Needless to say that one of the first things that popped in my mind, thinking about recent past events, was Covid-19, the Lockdown & the Pandemic. Now, as not aspirational as this may be, I simply couldn't deny the fact that Corona has completely affected and revolutionised, in a way or another, the majority of people's lives and many of our certainties.  Like it or not, willingly or unwillingly, this virus has impacted human kind profoundly, and I personally think that when something shakes us so deeply, space is created for us to learn something new about ourselves. The question is now, what? What have I personally learnt about myself during the Pandemic? What side of me has it revealed? What skills and tools have I acquired to face these challenges, that could potentially be transferable to my pedagogic awareness and knowledge? Scrolling through my I...

Our Module 1 Handbook invites us to interrogate ourselves on: Who are we as learners? A tricky question, to say the least, especially because I personally never really reflected on this before... Little did I know that my little 'quest' to answer this, would serve me the response on a silver platter. I started my Google search, as I normally would...and ELT popped up. In case you never heard of it (just like me a couple of hours ago), ELT  stands for EXPERIENTAL LEARNING THEORY. In a few words... learning by doing . But of course, there is way much more to it than that. Experiental learning focuses on the idea that the best way to learn is by actually having experiences, however experience alone does NOT produce a lot of learning. Experiential learning  requires deliberate effort to create new knowledge, and a conscious and aware intention to learn from our experience. John Dewey, one of the founding fathers of experiential learning , argues that experience alone does not prod...

Our Module 1 Handbook got me thinking on one thing... What is knowledge to me? And how have I gained it? As I asked myself this question, a multitude of thought threads started tangling up in my brain, so I thought a mind map would be the best way for me to seek some clarity. I am no mind map expert, nor the best visual artist, but this was an extremely elucidative exercise for me.  I am going to share it here on my blog, in the hope that it can initiate conversations.  After doing that, I thought I'd make some research into the topic. As I was looking on the Internet for the meaning of knowledge , this word kept coming up: EPISTEMOLOGY. Extremely simplified, epistemology  is the study of knowledge. It is the branch of philosophy that questions what are the necessary and sufficient conditions for knowing something.  Amongst a variety of tasks, epistemologists work on determining the nature  of knowledge. They divide knowledge  into two main categories: proc...

Yesterday I attended my very first MA lecture. It was a class inviting us to reflect on our own professional practice. Nothing I couldn’t expect, nothing I couldn’t foresee. Nothing I could anticipate would elicit an overwhelming emotional reaction in me. But it did. I felt a sense of validation I hadn’t experienced before. An awareness of being on the right path. A sense of belonging.  A place in which my journey had potential to be nourished, acknowledged, challenged and cultivated. A space of growth.   I feel like the first seed was planted. Questions. Picture credits: Quote Fancy

Hello! My name is Elly and welcome to my blog: Dancing. I'm a professional dancer with Ballet Pforzheim, and I am currently embarking on my next academic challenge undertaking a master's degree in Dance Technique Pedagogy. Alongside my dance career, commencing in 2011, I have developed a very strong passion for mentoring, tutoring, and education. I have teaching experience in a variety of contexts, including providing support to those applying to study dance in colleges and universities. Over the course of these years, I have been a youth company rehearsal director, led refugee integration community projects and taught ballet & contemporary dance classes internationally. These have all been incredibly rewarding experiences to say the least. Although I am still quite young, and still learning and growing myself, I have a strong desire to do my best to facilitate others in their personal dance journeys and explorations.  For many years I have dedicated myself body and soul to...